


Shiro and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day

by cascading



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Awkward Conversations, Embarrassment, M/M, POV Shiro (Voltron), Sex Shop, Shiro and Keith are cousins, broganes, mentions of BDSM, sorta - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-17
Updated: 2017-05-17
Packaged: 2018-11-01 18:23:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,155
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10927449
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cascading/pseuds/cascading
Summary: Shiro has just started a job at a sex shop. Unfortunately, he finds he's pretty familiar with some of the customers.Featuring Keith, Lance, and a blue dragon dildo.





	Shiro and the Terrible, Horrible, No-Good, Very Bad Day

**Author's Note:**

  * For [stover](https://archiveofourown.org/users/stover/gifts).



> I wrote this in exchange for pizza.

“There are only 7,506 potential realities in which this truly excellent ceiling harness will strangle you or otherwise cause bodily harm!”

Shiro, coming back from his break, pauses to press against his weary eyes, against the headache building behind them. He already hates this job—he knew he would, but he knew he could get it, and it pays above minimum, which is all he needs for now. He’s got to be stable enough to pay rent so Keith can stay in school.

“That sounds like a lot of potential realities,” an oddly familiar voice answers. Shiro starts to step forward to see who it is, and then he stops. He can’t let anyone know he’s working here, least of all—oh god.

Lance.

Which means: Keith.

Oh god, oh god, oh god.

Shiro ducks away towards the back as Slav, a smile clear in his voice, replies. “Oh no, hardly at all,” he says. “You see, the total number of potential realities exceeds…”

Stocking. He’ll get back to stocking. Inventory. Something.  Anything so he doesn’t have to see his baby cousin buying things at a sex shop, where he now works, where he purposefully didn’t tell said cousin that he now works, out of some misguided notion about Keith’s innocence.

Or maybe he just wanted to live in denial.

“Do you have any dildos that are…bigger?” Keith. Oh god. Shiro feels himself turning bright, bright red.

“Right up this way!” Slav says cheerily, and Shiro hears them coming towards him.

Avoid. Avoid, avoid—he ducks around, heading into the left side of the store where the petplay gear is. If Keith and Lance come over that direction, it won’t matter if they see him or not; Shiro will die on the spot if he has to see with his own two eyes that his cousin is a furry.

“Our dragon dildos,” Slav starts, “are ninety-six point four six three percent guaranteed to be the most stimulating—”

“Why not a hundred percent?” interrupts Lance. It’s so quiet in the store that even though Shiro’s almost clear to the other end by now, he can still hear every word.

“Well,” Slav starts to explain, “in certain potential realities, more advanced toys have been developed that we do not have access to in this reality!”

“But in this reality,” Lance pushes, but Keith interrupts.

“Here, look at this one, Lance. It’s a nice texture.”

“Oooooh,” says Lance. “Nice. Keith, my man, we are definitely getting this.”

“What color?” Keith asks.

“Blue for sure.”

“You always pick blue,” Keith grumbles.

“Perks of being a dom,” Lance sing-songs at him, and Shiro claps his hands over his ears.

Oh god. Oh god oh god.

“I think we should wait on the ceiling harnesses,” Keith is saying, when Shiro finally lowers his hands. “That seems like a big step, and we don’t have anywhere private enough to put them up.”

Shiro can practically hear Lance’s pouty face. “Aww, Keith, but I wanted—”

“There’s all sorts of stuff here,” Keith points out. “We could get nipple clamps, that’s easier to hide.”

“ _Yes_.” Lance’s enthusiasm returns. “Damn, you’re gonna look so pretty! Do they have blue ones of those, too?”

Shiro chokes. The selection of nipple clamps at the store is quite extensive, containing much more interesting things than just color variations. Shiro never considered himself a prude, but he really does not want to think about Keith in nipple clamps.

And sure enough, Slav is already on it. “There are some fascinating items in our selection,” he says. “Jewelry, bells, pompoms, every possible color…”

“Wait,” says Lance. “Are there like, themed sets? Ones with matching cock rings?”

Slav starts enthusing about the variety they have in stock. Meanwhile, Shiro guesses at what direction they’re heading—towards the back of the store still—and dodges front towards the cash register. He turns his back to tidy up the small pile of stuff people have left at the counter. He’s still blushing fiercely, hardly able to breathe for the sheer awkwardness.

He runs out of things to do at the register within five minutes. There are no other customers in the store, and really he should be restocking the shelves with vibrators, but Shiro just can’t bring himself to step out onto the floor again. Keith and Lance are presumably in the far corner of the store now, because he can’t tell what they’re saying anymore, but he can still hear the playful intonations as their voices rise and fall.

But also, he reminds himself, he just got this job, and he has to keep it. The job market has been so bad lately, and he has to pay off his student loans, and it’s really best if he and Keith have separate bedrooms. They’ve shared before, but it was rocky, and now with Lance around—

Shiro’s blush returns with a vengeance. No, he tells himself firmly. He has to do this job to the utmost. To the best of his ability, just like anything else. And if that means being square with Keith, so be it. If it means some awkwardness and shame, so be it.

He turns towards the floor and comes face to face with Keith.

Keith’s face is a marvel to watch. His eyes squint in bewilderment; his brows rise. Then slowly, far too slowly, he opens his mouth.

“Keith!” says Shiro. He says it lightly, grinning like it’s all a joke because there’s nothing else to do. “How can I help you?”

Lance darts around the corner, thankfully unaccompanied by Slav. He skids to a halt at the sight of Shiro, his mouth dropping open much, much faster than Keith’s.

“Keith!” he shrieks, stuttering over the word. “That’s—it’s—no way, no way, man, you can’t—” He fumbles with the items in his hands as if he’s trying to hide them from Shiro, which makes Keith look down at his own hands in turn.

He’s holding the blue dragon dildo.

Shiro knows he’s still magnificently red in the face, but he heaves out a laugh anyway. “Can I ring you up there, buddy?”

“What,” stumbles Lance, “no, I mean, no, you can’t just—he’s your _cousin_!”

“Why didn’t you tell me,” says Keith, quietly, under Lance’s steady stream of shocked chatter, and Shiro feels suddenly sad.

“I thought you wouldn’t want to know,” he says. “I thought it’d be awkward for you. You know, people asking you what your roommate does, all that.”

Keith surveys him for a moment. Then: “I don’t give a fuck,” he says, and plunks the dragon dildo on the counter. “Unless you do, I mean.”

Shiro laughs again, less forced this time. “As long as I don’t have to cut you out of any ceiling harnesses, I think we’ll be just fine.”

“We didn’t get one of those,” says Keith. “Don’t worry.”

“Good,” says Shiro, and he scans the dragon dildo.


End file.
